Whilst the cats are away...well, kids anyway...

Last Wednesday was unremarkable as far as hossie check goes, didn't want my bloods either so left early, which was useful as had to finish getting D and B sorted for their hols, and drop off at mums... they were all staying there to set off on early flight the next morning :)) Very exciting! Which meant a week of complete spoiling, and it was wonderful! I woke up around 10.30 each morning... blissful lie-ins! I had a visit from Lou, and Pam took me out to dinner and Em took me out for lunch :) M and B were around half the time and we had some nice times together too :) And this weekend B has strimmed and mowed - been an absolute star ... and then Mark from next door offered to spray the nettles with duck-friendly spray and help find some materials to make raised beds for beg too (he lives next door and works on the estate - always handy!) This Wed I had bloods and all ok again, plus picked up a Macmillan grant application form. Apparently my hickman referral was 'lost' by someone's secretary so they did a new one, so maybe THIS week I'll get a date! ;) It was my penultimate night with no kiddies, so had a little G & T sat out under the tree :)) The glorious weather is just superb and I am feeling quite perky and getting into summer party mode - we had our first bonfire of the season last night :) It's mixed blessings as I have friends with new diagnosis, friends facing scans, friends whose dog has died... so I am sending them all huge hugs and love too. Life IS a roller coaster, I don't care what anyone else may say! And then Friday morning, picked up my girlies!!!!!!!! :D Lots of cwtchs and lots of holiday tales especially from Deri! ;) This eve, Lou came down again, and we were off to watch "As you like it" by a company called Come Rain or Shine (always perform outside) on Glanusk, and meeting Gez n Em too. Deri came along and LOVED it which was great coz it lasted 3 hours and she was transfixed by it all, once she had asked me a few questions about who was who haha! And very wonderfully, we had 2 free tickets given to us by Mark's brother! It was great show and the performers were fab. Must go to the next one :)) Lou had to disappear to get back for baby Vince, and I put Deri to bed and went over to Gez and Em's for a nightcap :)) So now it's 2 am and I should go to bed :)) Life is feeling good again, so it had better frigging stay that way!

The evidence says ...

Forgot to update re: Wednesday's appointment! Too busy having coffee with friends....... ;-) Saw the consultant after I had been flushed.. she confirmed that they would book me a PET scan about 2 weeks before my checkup, I said ,, 'oh good, we can see if it worked' ... she said, by looking at me and how I look, the evidence is pointing towards me being fine... I LIKED that positivity :)) Let's see what they all say in June! :) It was brilliant to see two of my loveliest friends on Wednesday too. In July I am going to have a big birthday bash and have as many of my friends there that can make it :)) It should be a celebration of all sorts!!

Bank Holidays and Countdowns

Well, it's mostly raining so it MUST be a bank holiday ;) Looking forward to a few things this week ... coffee at Lynne's Wed morning before I have tubes flushed (haha not for long!!) and then coffee and catch up with LM on Wednesday after we have both had our appointments... haven't seen each other since before we both went in for ops and transplants so we can have a more relaxed coffee and not pretend we're not scared haha :)) Thursday my favourite midwife is taking me to lunch!! How spoiled am I? I was moaning about how long it will take to get check up etc and suddenly we're already 1 week into May which means it's only 6 weeks til I go to the Heath again?! I'll try to remember this week when I'm down the Windsor suite being flushed, to ask if I'll be having scans etc or if they can just tell from bloods, which seems unlikely to me but then who knows! Saying SHUSH to the What-If's because I can't be worrying about nonsense like that for the next 6/7 weeks! My legs are now normal, apart from the mottled skin, but at least I don't look like some frantic skin-shedding freak any more ;-) I'm putting cream on my hands and face as they are stil a bit dry. My energy levels are still low but much better and I can pootle around more now. Looking forward to doing stuff in the summer now, when I'll be even more 'myself' ;) I have a house full of my free range teens and their boyfriends today! Deri is lurking with Broni and hers coz they are watching Harry Potter and I am in my room with my feet up on the sofa :)) Megz wants to go clothes shopping and Ben doesn't and they don't know what else to do so they've ended up cleaning and clearing her room hahaha! If only it wasn't raining, I'd have them mowing the VERY overgrown lawn ;) My mother had some tests and it seems it is not angina which is good, but her lungs aren't functioning properly so probably get more pills! Bryan's hip hurts lots so we need to get him to the GP coz he's beinga 'bloke' and won't go; Aunti Phyl (Bry's last living relative at 93 yrs old) is deteriorating and so they're going to check on her, in Devon, tomorrow..she won't go into hospital in case she doesn't come back out bless her. So sending all of them healing hugs and blesings too! The donations for the Race for Life keep increasing! HUGE thank you's to everyone for being so generous... I am looking forward to it very much!! I think a nap might be in order, although it'll be light coz Deri is lurking!

Hickman, you're on your way out!

Wednesdays seem to roll round quite quickly. I took a while to wake up properly this morning, on a Go Slow mode... Deri asked if I was ok today because I was talking slowly... bless her! So on the ball. Makes me proud of her but sad that she has to have that little niggle to deal with. I told her I was just a bit slow this morning! She's excited too because her new friend from her new school is coming for tea! ;-) Anyway, it was tubes flushed AND bloods and dressing change today, so off I trooped. Had a chat with Sandra about kids crashing their cars, chatted with a lady who can't find a good aromatherapist, I said I used to do that but for obvious reasons don't do it right now - she said could she call me in a few months and see if I was doing it again? Hmm, this could be interesting :)) Also bumped into a lady who was waiting to have her spleen out the same week I was due to go in for transplant - she was on a bed having chemo - she said it was her first session as when they took the spleen out they found out she had NHL - oh I said, "oh same as me... you'll do just fine. Well, I am sure she will, but felt sorry for her when thinking of possible bone marrow tests and maybe the SCT... I was wearing my scarf I got from the wig shop, she liked it and we chatted about wigs and cutting hair shorter and getting funky with hats and scarves... I never wore anything like that before, apart from a sunhat occasionally, so I have learned a new skill - tying scarves in comfortable and acceptable ways hahaha! Good news, my bloods were all very good, and a referral has gone in to get the Hickman line out - whhoohooo!!! Can't wait for that :)))) Popped in to see Jo and ended up having lunch there which was fab, then had an email from a certain "TinTin" who says there are 2 trollbeads winging their way over from Luxembourg?! I am rather spoilt methinks! I feel very positive and as though everything is working, but there's tests and scans and checkups to come and that's a bit of a drag as I want to say goodbye to it all now! But then that's a bit impatient and you have to be more cunning than that when dealing with stoopid cancer :D

Improvements

So what's happening this week? Well, the dry skin is still with me, but the intensive peeling on my legs is improving and I no longer leave a shower of skin on the floor when I get undressed etc!! As my skin peels the ''chemo tan'' is fading but I still have it on my face and chest. My nails grew really long, I lost my hair again (all over body too) but my eyebrows and eyelashes have STILL hung in there! My energy levels are slowly improving and I can now cook a meal or wash up without feeling utterly exhausted... I do have to sit down afterwards but I don't feel wiped out anymore! Went to have my tubes flushed today, and the doc came over for a chat too, and said they are thinking of getting me a date quite soon to have the Hickman line removed! I will be waiting impatiently for the 3 week healing period then so I can lie immersed in a bath up to my chin, after so long with a shallow bath haha! And, the sponsorship target has had to be raised as we smashed it in 3 days!! :)))

Beautiful people

Well, I have to confess to being somehwat bowled over by the lovely actions of some friends this week!! Funnily enough, LM and I had been muttering about trying to walk around one of the Race for Life routes this summer. With lots of pit stops ;-) Then, a couple of days ago, Claire asked if I'd mind if she set up a team page for people to run one of the routes in honour of me!!??!! I had a lot of dust in my eye after that...

Anyway, it happened! There's a facebook page to promote it and a Justgiving donations page to sponsor us all, and LM is coming along too and Claire put up a a target of £400 which got smashed in just 3 days so she's raised it to £600 now hahahaha!!!!!

Both LM and I commented earlier that it has made us realise what an enormous impact us having cancer has had upon our friends. I kinda knew that people were concerned and loving and supportive, but this whole team run thing has highlighted just how fucking amazing the people are that I know!!! I am overwhelmed, and thrilled, and stunned, and keep getting eye incontinence ;-)

It means more than I can express to know how loved I am, and to admit that I am loved actually! My step father said previously that he has been impressed by how brilliant my friends have been, and it's true. Not just running a race, which is fab, but the calls, the queries, the surprises, little gifts, the treats, hugs, holding my hand, little messages which can light up a gloomy day, just being there for me in a myriad of amazing and simple and very special ways. This includes my family, all of them, my daughters of course, my friends near and far, old and new, the hospital staff, and friends I met on Macmillan that I may never meet in the flesh but who have been just as supportive as my friend 1 mile away! Each and every one of them has helped me cope with bastard cancer in all sorts of ways. I don't know how I can ever truly express my gratitude.

I guess staying alive and truly kicking cancer's arse would be one way .... ?! ;-)

More good stuff

I am feeling a bit stronger again this week, trying to pace myself so I don't overdo it! My bloods were better again this Wednesday so don't need to go back for 2 weeks this time. Sandra the nurse said that once they can see my bloods stabilising in a few weeks, they can arrange to get me in and get the hickman line out - whoo hoo!!!!! And they were high enough to allow me to pop into local shops if I need something! I drove "a lot" (compared to what I am used to at the moment anyway) yesterday and my legs ached this morning, so I guess that's something to keep in mind!
It's very wet and cold this week - today I was in all day - Lynne came over with a big bun and we chatted over pints of coffee and lit the woodburner... been lovely!
Deri started her new school yesterday and has settled in straight away, and made new friends too! In the playground today I was waiting to pick her up and one of the mums started to chat to me - turns out her and her hubby have a furniture business running from one of the units on Glanusk, where they rent out workshops! And our daughters came out together chatting and played in the yard :)) The mum is called Rachel and she said we'd have to go round one day for coffee and a play :))
So next month mum and Bry are taking the kids on holiday - Megz and Ben aren't going - it'll just be me and them for a week, but no Broni or Deri for a week. Lots of lie-ins heehee!! Be very quiet round here!!!!!